Hi friends,
I called someone an asshole on Thursday. He was riding his bike aggressively and almost clipped my friend, who was riding beside me. We couldn’t tell if he said something to us or was barking into his headset. I hadn’t called him an asshole yet.
On the next lap, he rode between us, very fast, startling both of us. I said, “Words?” and he slowed to say something like, “Here are some words. You two are riding slowly and taking up too much space.” I replied that all he had to do was call out “on your right!” and we would have moved over. He said that he had, and then sped off. That’s when I called him an asshole.
He may or may not have heard me. Still, it’s not the way I like to interact with people.
I was in a classroom this week where there had been a fight two days before. The teacher was still upset about it. I have been there, frightened for the safety of my students and myself, and aware of the work it will take to come back from what was said and done.
Kamari Hampton, age 7, was crossing the street on his scooter in Brooklyn, in the crosswalk, when he was killed by an NYPD tow truck. His mother was beside him. I don’t know how she comes back from this shocking loss. We know Kamari does not.
A young person I love was locked down at college in Maine, while the manhunt continued for the individual who shot more than 30 people with “a military-style semiautomatic rifle.” The rampage began in a bowling alley and continued in a bar and a hospital. Eighteen people have died. The perpetrator was found dead last night.
These are not morally equivalent violations. All of them somehow remind me of the moments in my career when I have implored everyone to stop and sit down.
We are destroying each other and ourselves and we need to stop.
This week, Maine Representative Jared Golden finally reversed his opposition to an assault weapons ban, apologizing to his constituents for his failure to act. We can wonder what took so long, and still be grateful that finally, he sees the problem.
Paolo Freire noted long ago that our life’s work is to become more fully human.
Susan Collins, Senator of Maine, is still not sure about banning assault weapons. Don’t call her names. Sit down, take a breath, and call her: (202) 224-2523.
Call on Congress to reinstate the Federal Assault Weapons Ban. This quick action is from Everytown for Gun Safety.
My friend, whose son is in Maine, told me that a relative in Israel wrote to express concern for him. My friend’s reaction was
how fucking crazy is that?
I reminded her that I had never heard of Everytown for Gun Safety until her son spoke about it at his Bar Mitzvah, several months after the Parkland shooting. We are all engaged in the long project of becoming more fully human, which requires that we share in each other’s vulnerability.
This week’s email from my cousin in Israel described what life is like for her and her family.
The situation here is scary and unstable. We are actually in a quiet part of the country (about 50 miles from the border with Lebanon and Syria) which is good. But we live with a lot of anxiety about what might happen today or next week. Yesterday, Hamas shot missiles that reached Tel Aviv, the coastal plain, and most of the south of Israel near Gaza. Hizbolla shot missiles from Syria into the Golan Heights. The communities on the northern border and the southern border have been evacuated. The only reason we are not dying from all these missiles is that they are being shot down by our defense systems.
My cousin was describing the Iron Dome defense system, which
is equipped with a radar that detects rockets and then uses a command-and-control system that quickly calculates whether an incoming projectile poses a threat or is likely to hit an unpopulated area. If the rocket does pose a threat, the Iron Dome fires missiles from the ground to destroy in the air.
The US government has spent nearly $3 billion on Iron Dome. Israelis have it. The people of Gaza do not.
On Monday, I recommended this excellent essay by Nicholas Kristof, which I mistakenly attributed to another Times writer. Read it again.
Read “We Must Not Kill Gazan Children to Try to Protect Israel’s Children.”
When I started writing this post, Israel’s army, the IDF, was poised to invade Gaza. The people of Gaza have nowhere to go and the Israeli government was unclear what their objectives are.
“Some would say that we have to start — then we can think about the next stage,” said Mr. Danon, a member of the foreign affairs and defense committee in the Israeli Parliament. “But we as the leadership, as statesmen, we have to set the goals, and the goals should be very clear,” he said. “It shouldn’t be vague.”
Everybody, sit down.
Demand a ceasefire by all parties to end civilian suffering. This quick action comes from Amnesty International.
On Thursday evening, I thought I needed a time-out of sorts. Fortunately, a friend had planned a field trip for us to go look at some art. It was a glorious day.
We got back to Grand Central and found ourselves in the giant protest organized by Jewish Voice for Peace. We sang with them. It felt good to stand up.
This morning’s news brings more fear and instability. I am aware that the way forward is complicated, that Hamas is dangerous.
I do not have the answers. I believe a time out for peace would not make the situation worse, and could result in the release of Israeli hostages and relief for the civilian population of Gaza.
My companion yesterday is the widow of Juris Jurjevics, friend and editor to James Baldwin. When we were walking in the sun in Westchester, talking about the children in Gaza and in Israel, she quoted Baldwin to me:
The children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe; and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality.
My friend, who is herself an artist and a thinker, also quoted Eleanor Roosevelt:
When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?
Now would be good. What if we took some time out to think about this?
with love,
L